This practice must be brought back to homes again, where the husband’s objective is to always do things that will touch his wife’s heart and also to make her feel loved. That’s what Jesus did to us as a church, the bride of the Lamb of God. We have lost romance in our homes and given to tight schedule at work, business and ministry etc. Some men are no longer bothered if their wives feel loved or not, they only care for the things of their own and that’s not in line with the word of God. But this must change.
1 Corinthians 10:24 “Do not seek your own good, but the good of the other person.” NET
Husbands need to seek after the things of their own wives, they must learn to pay attention to the need of their wives and be sensitive enough to do them when identified.
To take a few point on how to make your wife feel loved.
- Praying for her always especially when she’s facing some challenges
Your wife need your prayers always as she need to stand even in her walk with the Lord, she need your prayers when she is facing some challenges, she needs your prayers when she is confused and when worry over takes her mind. The word that can get your wife’s heart mostly when she is worried or in a difficult time may not be “I love you” but it may be “Sweetheart, am praying for you” she will understand this better in that situation that you’re paying attention to her need.
“A woman loves it when her husband leaves his own sphere for hers”
The truth is there is something in a woman’s heart that is different from what a man have in his heart, when you’re thinking of something she may be thinking of something else which you may need to address and leave your own. She may just need your prayers and not the word “I love you” that prayer will express I love you to her better.
- Give her a serious attention
I use the word “serious” because she really need it that way. With no woman left aside, what all women love is attention. A man that is set to give his wife attention will gain her heart more.You must give her your attention she needs it very dearly and daily. A woman loves to be in control just as the man but when it comes to getting attention she needs it more.
“A selfless husband that is not given to his own way will have his wife’s best”
The truth about a woman is this, you’ll get back what you sow into her life, even when you know she lack some things, just by sowing it into her life will make her have them and then you’ll reap from it in no time.
- Listening to your wife
This is one part that most men fail because women tend to talk more than the men, though there are some men that talk more than the women, but the percentage is low. But as husbands we must learn to listen to our wives, they need us to listen to them first than they need us to provide answers to what they want to say. Naturally men are structured to solve problems and we tend to do this when they want to tell us what’s on their minds but when it comes to listening to our wives, we actually solve it by listening to them.
“Everyone love someone that listens to them and they love to spend more time with such”
What you need to do is to strategically pay attention when she’s speaking, look straight into her eyes, follow her words by listening to what she is saying, you can repeat some of her words so that she can understand you are following her.
“A man that learn to listen to his wife will have the best of his wife”
You can also say words like “am following you, am listening to you sweetheart” when she hears this, she will understand fully that you’re listening and she’s in control of the talk while you listen. Learn to make her be in control then you listen.
- Learn to appreciate your wife
I learn this very early even when I was not in a relationship, I realized that some of the ladies that I related with love it when I say that their hair is beautiful, when I knew this I begin to practice it with my partner and of course I got her to behave like a baby! One day I was shocked when one of my Pastors said his wife had to call his attention to the new hair she just did by telling him to say something about it, which she has been expecting from him after parading and moving before him so that he can just notice her new look but he couldn’t, then he apologized and said something about her hair, from this I understood that even at old age she will still appreciate it.
“No matter who appreciate your wife she still keep a strong desire within her to hear it from your mouth”
This should not be limited to their hair alone, their dress, their beauty and how they look even their meals. Never end a meal by standing up from the table but end it with a word of appreciation to your wife “Baby, the meals is highly delicious” words like this will make her feel loved and feel encouraged.
- Help her in household chores
This is one thing I learn to do from Rev. Kenneth E. Hagin, he said he always help his wife in the kitchen by washing the dishes, that if he expect his wife to help him in the ministry then he must also help her in the kitchen. When I read this in his book I just adjusted my heart to begin to practice it. I tell you just staying in the kitchen with your wife and engage her with enough “gisting” alone will touch her heart not to talk of washing the dishes or preparing the meals. You can also do some other things in the home, the toilet and the rest. Things you observed she does more in the home. When we live to practice this, she will know that you’re really giving yourself to her as Christ gave Himself to the Church.